It's no use hiding it. This year has been the worst year of my life. So painful that my desire to live had just vanished for a while. But after all the problems are gone, and after starting to get my life back (starting with a new take on the Code::Blocks IDE - I'm adding some new features to the Search & replace dialog), I read my previous posts on this blog.
And you know what I found out? That all the suffering these past few months had just felt like a nightmare. Like a horrible nightmare that I was just waking up from.
I really don't know if you understand me, but if you're on the edge of desiring to die, please, gather all your strength and live! There IS light at the end of the tunnel. It's just hard to struggle and to cope with the aftermath, but there is hope.
Well, it's getting late and I need to finish this programming thing by monday. Maybe tomorrow I'll read chapter 2 of Blade Runner.